The truth about layouts

The problem with motorhomes (and caravans) in Australia is that we are spoilt for choice. There are so many brands with so many layout options, it’s easy to understand how choosing to buy an RV can quickly become a marriage, as well as budget straining activity.

The motorhome layout is particularly contentious when a husband and wife are involved because let’s face it; men and women see completely different things when they’re standing before an RV.

Where she sees a mobile settee with built in tea and coffee making facilities, he sees a mobile workshop and toy transport system. As soon as the ‘search’ begins, the trouble begins!

Buying a car is so much easier. Five seats or seven? Engine fast or engine frugal? Nothing else really matters. If you like the colour and the price, buy it and those same five seats will do exactly what you expect they will do every time you drive the thing.

A motorhome is different. If you have driven one motorhome, you have driven them all (think boat-like, jolly and slow) which is why the layout gets
so much attention. There are beds and food making facilities and toilets and showers -- all in the space of a broom closet. Throw in a couple of serves of jelly, shut the door and let’s party…

Except that would only work if 18 year olds could afford motorhomes and they can’t so let’s return to the real world where we need to make this work for mature folk like you and me. Forget all this talk of jelly and let’s focus instead on more important things, like doors.

Did you know where the ‘house’ door is located on your RV is absolutely critical to happy travels? ‘House’ doors can often be rattly, draughty and let in road noise so give some thought to how close to the driving cab your door is if you or your partner like none of these things.

If you are married to a cleaning obsessive, I recommend you ensure the toilet is in close proximity to the door and that the toilet is separate to the shower. This may make no sense on an RV dealer’s paved forecourt but it will save you much heartache.

A combined shower and toilet gets a wet floor when you use it. Dirty feet become muddy feet and the whole lot gets tracked up and down inside your pristine motorhome.

Enter the divorce lawyer!

The other thing about door placement concerns which side you exit the vehicle. On American-sourced motorhomes, the house door is actually on the driver side of the vehicle, which isn’t an issue in a caravan park but an entirely different matter when parked on the side of a busy road.

For those of you buying a motorhome with a man, you need to be aware that he’s almost certainly going to have storage anxiety at some stage of the buying process and this will almost certainly be at the seat of any major disagreements about your motorhome layout.

For example, that big island bed you have your heart set on, could set him on edge because an east-west facing bed (the one he wants - you know, where you need to clamber over him in the middle of the night to get to the loo) can offer much more storage by comparison.

Unfortunately storage anxiety is not really curable so it’s best nipped in the bud early. I know men with a 40 foot coach motorhome and a 7m trailer who still lament they don’t have enough room for everything, so be warned.

If your man starts talking about ‘upgrading’ his licence, ‘towing' a trailer or he comes home one day with a new welding mask, seek professional help or else your motorhome will almost certainly end up with some exciting ‘additions’ spot welded to the bumper bar.

Of course the only way you can be sure a layout will really suit you is to try it out for a day or so.

Sleep, eat and… well, do everything you want to do in the motorhome before you buy and you will almost certainly learn something valuable from the experience.

Some dealerships will allow you to ‘borrow’ a motorhome (with some pretty intense conditions) or you can simply rent one.

Renting may not be the cheapest exercise but there are certain things in life worth doing right and spending $100,000-plus on a house on wheels is probably one of them.